broken open
humbled
in a hole
not at the bottom, but falling
i don't grab for anything
because there's nothing to grab
i'm trying
i'm trying
but trying is never good enough
and i don't know how to stop trying
inherent flaw
i don't know where from
it always has been
gnawing flaw
flaw leading to humility
only shameful humility
do i not know how to love?
or am i just a poor lover?
or do i just make mistakes
wall between us
if you forgive
i cannot accept
because trying isn't good enough
if you don't
i wither and toss and turn
stormy waves inside me
and i'm seasick
