he'll make the rivers and rocks sing his praise

Why does God use people?
like me?

don't you hate guilt?
it kills you
i mean, i feel bad for everything i've done wrong
but, for me i know, the devil is really good
at letting it crush me

have you ever felt bad for something you did forever ago?
yeah,
it shouldn't be that way
if you've been forgiven by the Forgiver

or even something yesterday
or this morning
or 10 minutes ago

anyways
that's not what this is about
because once you overcome that hurdle
when you know and feel forgiven...

there's yet another hurdle.

it's rather odd too
like an oxymoron

it is
that we feel too small
or awesome

or perhaps both
one now
the other in just a moment

so why does God use people?
is it because something good in us?

sometimes i really doubt that

i'm really shy
it's one of many things that makes me weak
one of the things that prevents or slows me
when God asks me to do something.

there are plenty such things wrong with me

i am humbled by it
like Paul's thorn perhaps
i realize that i'm no good at much anything sometimes

but apparently...
he uses the weak to overcome the strong?

'"But I'm so small I can barely be seen
how can this great love be inside of me?"
Look at your eyes
they're small in size
but they see enormous things'

i found something incredible in Luke the other day
John said something in chapter 3

'For I tell you that out of these stones God can raise up children for Abraham.'

I decided this means a few things
being God's children does not make you special
it comes from God.
stones?!
God can use... stones
to beat our best attempts...
ouch

so...
like i wrote on my xanga/facebook this last weekend i think
...
THAT
is why we shouldn't try to do things
God can do so much

you know...
he really doesn't even need us if that's the case
there's plenty of rocks for him to use

But wait..
he doesn't does he?
how come?
the rocks never did anything to him
and
i... can't claim that



God made us both...
when he made the rocks he said
it is good
when he made me
he said
it is very good

that's pretty cool

how odd it is
that he chooses you
above the stones

there's too parts to us
there's something inside us that God made which is good
and there's the rest.
that is the mess of our handiwork.
the sin we started,
and the failed attempts to fix it.

God made something good in us
that is why he uses us
not because of who we have made ourselves to be
but because of who we could be
of who we were made to be

you have no claim on that glory.
it was given to you
and can be given again though

so maybe the stones have not failed God
but we
are very good

if we just let us be how he made us to


well...

I don't know about you
but if God chooses me like that
I will try to love better

i will try to be the very good that I am
instead of that which i have been.

there's no way I'm gonna let a freaking rock
outlove me

Not that i'm competing with rocks to worship God ^_^

but you know what i mean

sea in a fish

A fish swims through the sea
while the sea is, in a certain sense, contained within the fish!
Oh, what am I to think of what the writing of a thousand life times could not explain
if all the forest trees were pens and all the oceans, ink?
{more mewithoutYou}

how insignificant is a fish in the sea?
aren't there trillions of fish?
yet the ocean is so big that there are vast places of just water

you are a fish
and the sea is God's love

do you swim in such great love?

but the second line gets the exclamation point!

the ocean is not contained in a fish
that's preposterous.
that's like something they'd tell you when you're doing quantum physics or nuclear chemistry

and yet
all that love
in me

sounds absurd
but you know it's true
or at least it could be

you know those illustrations they give in church?
you're a glass and God's a pitcher and he fills you up so much you overflow

how cute

please realize that to suggest God's love is like a pitcher of water is a sad disproportion
granted it's hard to bring the ocean inside to make a point
i guess they can't really do that

but that's the point!

and please realize that to suggest God fills you up so that water starts trickling over the side
is also a sad disproportion

no no
it would be more correct to throw the cup in the ocean

you
insignificant fish
can swim in a big ocean

and the ocean can be contained inside of you


and now...
it makes sense to say that in all their lifetimes
1000 people
with all the pens and paper in the world
could not begin to explain or grasp that

church bells

song lyrics....
they're incredibly perfect
sorry i put up song lyrics so often
God just really speaks to me a lot through things i read. whether that's books, poems, songs, whatever.
i'll try to be better at commenting on them myself...

' asleep in the chapel'
by thursday

three chalk outlines sleep in the dirty street
and in our beds, under the sheets
they're the halo of guilt hanging around your neck
next to the rosary you count, falling asleep

and we're praying
these are the symptoms of letting go of all our hope

since we can't compete with martyred saints
we'll douse ourselves in gasoline
and hang our bodies from the lampposts
so that our shadows turn into bright lights

'white light, white heat' we'll make
as we're blacking out in the center lane
(we swerve) to the beat, (spill) all the ink
(no revisions) do you hear the church bells ringing?

wake up!! wake up in an outline and try to speak
with the shattered voice of the lives we lead...
have we slept too long
between the bullet holes in a stained-glass window state?

and we're praying
these are the symptoms of letting go of all our hope
(when we repent)
and we're praying
(we fall on the page, read in the margins)
we are the symptoms of letting go of all our hope

someday we'll be complete like modern saints
baptize our kids in gasoline
and hang our doubts up in cathedrals
so that they turn to faith in the colored sunlight

'red rain, red rain' we'll make
as we're blacking out in the center lane
(we swerve) to the beat, (spill) all the ink
(no revisions) do you hear the church bells ringing?

they ring for you.

we woke up this morning to a sky with no air in it
and all the streets are filled with a thousand burning crosses
and what we thought was the sunrise, just passing headlights
still the choir girls sing, 'oh lord, can you save us? oh lord, sing hallelujah'

they are the symptoms of letting go of all our hope...
we're falling asleep with open eyes
falling asleep inside the chapel
falling asleep in chalk outlines
falling asleep as the headlights pass us by...


there are a few things to notice
things i like

first is the gasoline baptism
what a beautiful picture
John baptized with water
what does that mean? my understanding has always been like a washing off of sin
you confess your dirtiness to God and he forgives you
the baptism is symbolic of what's going on
is that what baptism is today?

God changed things a bit
he baptizes us with the Holy Spirit it says
with himself
in Acts he came into our hearts
we use that phrase a lot
i like the way it says it in 'The Vision': we've had a blood transfusion with Jesus
that's what it means

he came upon them like fire!
why do we have cuddly happy baptisms
let us stop baptizing with water
and smiling at our friends about how happy it is
let us come to God ready for him to ignite us on fire
and let us spread this idea
to our friends
and one day to our children
why must we be "Christians"
why can't we be modern saints
modern Stephens
modern Peters
modern Pauls

see
so many are asleep
i would drop the word Christian if it was possible
Christians, as defined by the world today, are asleep
maybe in church, but very asleep
they disagree over every other thing
many go to church just once or twice a year
heck, many go to church every week
and are still asleep

wake up!! wake up!
the church bells ring for you
church bells were created to let the people around know that they needed to stop what they were doing
and come to church
come to God
can you hear them ringing for you?

or are you so distracted by school,
your girlfriend,
a cute boy,
your weight,
your friends,
your problems (as real as they may be),
video games,
sports,
marching band,
that you don't even realize that they are ringing?

and
when you do hear
and you are stunned
and you vow to not go back to sleep...
do you lay in bed just one more minute
and fall back asleep in its warmth and comfort?

i see that happening all around me
i do it too i know
how sad

just because you're eyes are open and you're alive
doesn't mean you are awake
are you falling asleep, in a chalk outline?
are you in the church, but still sleeping?

wake up

meaning

this is more of a test than anything else...but

part of a mewithoutYou song says this:
'or if I'm a crown without a king, if I'm a broken, open seed
If I come without a thing, I come with all I need'

crowns are absolutely nothing without a king
they're not even crowns really

broken, open seeds die
well, they were never alive
after that it never will be

interestingly enough
that is how we are to come to God

he makes us the crown on his head
he does the impossible and gives us life

he gives me life

when plants grow
they spread more life
maybe he'll use me to do that

another thing
a Classic Crime song says:
'A warrior poet once said
You're not dead yet so live like you could be
A warrior poet said
Have no regrets when you're old'

i like that idea
a warrior poet
poets write and say powerful things
warriors do powerful things

all very beautiful